Breasts and Bullies

Hello All,

Bet that title caught your eye! What do breasts and bullies have in common? The month of October! It is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month and National Bullying Prevention Awareness Month. Both critically important topics for us. Both can lead to harm – both can scar, physically and emotionally – both can lead to death. Both can be prevented and/or minimized with early detection. Both require us to act. Both are topics I am very passionate about.

Did you know that it is still a fact that 1 out of every 8 women will develop invasive breast cancer over the course of her lifetime. Breast cancer is the second most common cancer for women in the United States. In 2021, over 281,500 women and over 2,300 men will be diagnosed with breast cancer. For women in the US, breast cancer deaths are second only to lung cancer. More Black women will die of breast cancer than white women – they are often diagnosed under the age of 40, more often to be diagnosed at later stages, and have to deal with inherent racism in our systems. Over 43,600 women and 500 men will die in 2021. As importantly – 85% to 90% of breast cancers occur in women with NO KNOWN FAMILY HISTORY of breast cancer!

It is important to take care of YOU. Know your risk! get information about your family history. Susan G. Komen has a great tool called My Family Health History – use it – komen.org/fhht/index.html . Do monthly self breast exams – you know your body better than anyone. If you find something you think is not normal for you, get it checked out! Get your screening mammograms done – annually starting at age 40, and if you are at risk, talk with your doctor and start earlier. If you are at risk, talk to your doctor about genetic screening and counseling.

I am a breast cancer victor. I don’t want any woman to experience this – or if you do, I want it to be discovered early. Take the time to keep yourself healthy, informed and cancer free!

Bullying is as damaging to people – physically and psychologically – as any disease. We have to find a way to end bullying and cyberbullying. Michelle Obama in her book Becoming said:

“Women endure entire lifetimes of these indignities—in the form of catcalls, groping, assault, oppression. These things injure us. They sap our strength. Some of the cuts are so small they’re barely visible. Others are huge and gaping, leaving scars that never heal. Either way, they accumulate. We carry them everywhere, to and from school and work, at home while raising our children, at our places of worship, anytime we try to advance.”

Well said. Now expand this definition out to include children – other people – the oppressed. Bullying is flat out abuse – it leaves indelible marks – on the skin, on the mind, on the soul. We have got to find a way to stop this. To make this world a safe place for all people. To make this a world where we can have a civil, respectful discourse about differences and learn from them, celebrate them, make decisions and policies that support rather than hurt and distract.

I am very worried about the children in this world who are witnessing these bullying behaviors from their parents to others, from their neighbors to others, from their elected officials to others – in school board meetings, in city council chambers, on their neighborhood streets, in our governmental agencies. What will they carry with them? That threatening language is okay? That yelling and screaming and demeaning others is the way the world works or gets things done? That intimidation is okay? Will that become the children’s way to handle the future?

I applaud the school systems who are actively working to stop bullying. I love that this is the theme of the whole month of October. I am going to borrow with dignity the plans that the Canadian school system laid out for the individual weeks – themes and activity plans:

1. Make friends with someone you don’t know. They also formally recognized National Coming Out Day on October 11th.
2. STAND UP for others
3. The 3rd week is the Week of Inclusion.
4. Start conversations among your peers.

Perhaps we should all be going back to school!

Take care of your health – get you screening mammogram done.

Be a role model. Govern your actions and your deeds. You do not do this in a vacuum – others are watching and learning from you! Remember these words from Desmond Tutu – “If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.”

Chose wisely.

Phyl

P.S. I am sorry I did not post last week! Have you ever just run out of week? That was me! I will do better! (Well, I will try. I am not always the queen of organization!)